Some Favorite Quotes

On Men in Relationships

• Oh Marge, I am going to miss you so much. And it's not just the sex, it's also the food prepration.
  (Homer Simpsons in the episode "Marge in chain".)
  
• Marge: There's going to be twice as much love in this house as there is now!
  Homer: We're going to start doing it in the morning?!
  (from the episode "Lisa's first word".)

On Marriage

• I think that gay marriage is something that should be between a man and a woman 
  (Arnold  Schwarzenegger in an interview during the California gubernatorial campaign, 2003)
  

• A government that would deny a gay man the right to bridal registry is a fascist state.
  (Margaret Cho in Notorius C.H.O., 2000)

Memorable Onion Articles

• Lewinsky Subpoened to Re-blow Clinton on Senate Floor:

"We Must Know Exactly What Happened," Say Legislators.
• Deaf Man's Deaf Friends Way Too Into Deaf Culture
• God Answers Prayer of Paralyzed Little Boy: "No," Says God
• Microsoft Patents Ones, Zeroes
• Supreme Court Overturns Car
• Aliens Demand More Positive Portrayal in the Media
• '98 Homosexual Recruiting Drive Nearing Goal
• Teen Exposed to Violence, Profanity, Adult Situations By Family
• Christian Right Lobbies to Overturn Second Law of Thermodynamics
• ACLU Defends Nazi's Right To Burn Down ACLU Headquarters
• Judge Orders God To Break Up Into Smaller Deities

Misc

• I cannot go see a bad movie by myself. What, am I going to make sarcastic remarks to strangers?
  (Jerry Seinfeld in the "Chinese Restaurant" episode)
  
• More than at any time in history mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness, the other to total extinction. Let us pray that we have the wisdom to choose correctly
  (Woody Allen)
  
• Homer: Sometimes I think we are the worse family in this town
  Marge: Maybe we should move to a larger community
  
• Interviewer: What do you think of Western civiliation?
Mohandas Gandhi: I think it would be a very good idea.

• Feminism is the radical notion that women are people
(Cheris Kramarae)

• Homer: Please don't eat me! I have a wife and kids. Eat them!

Bumper Stickers Seen in Berkeley

• If this is blue, you are going too fast
  [On a red sticker. Yes, we have physics nerds in Berkeley]
• Legalize freedom
• Behind every successful woman is herself
• Procrastinate later
• I believe in life before death
• The Christian Right is neither

[Also the variant "The moral majority is neither"]