burnout from not doing anything

have you guys heard about the greenland shark. some crazy shit happening there.

they are sexually mature at ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY YEARS OLD.

their (live!) young gestate for. wait for it. eight to eighteen (??) YEARS. can have up to 10 at a time. good grief.

longest lifespan of any vertebrate, up to five hundred years

toxic flesh

has giant eyes but is usually blind because of a weird little crustacean that's evolved to live on and eat their eyes. this doesn't seem to bother them much.

lives in deep cold water and has the lowest swim speed and tail-beat frequency for its size across all fish species. just generally lives life in extreme slow motion

largest genome of any shark

eats everything including moose and polar bears

ma'am you are delightfully strange and I'm privileged to share a planet with you

this post prompted me to refresh my memory on Greenland Shark Facts and this detail about how they feed goes so hard

just vacuuming up their unsuspecting prey. whole !

Good news good news good news! Recent research suggests the eye parasites do NOT blind them!

I <3 you a normal amount Greenland sharks

my problem is if i enjoy something enough i will be nitpicking. i Will have things to say about where and how it failed. out of nothing but love straight from my heart. unfortunately this often makes me indistinguishable from a hater who has never experienced joy or kindness. such is the amateur critic's burden.

i’m pretty calm and understanding but if i say “please don’t touch me” and you proceed to purposefully touch me, natural instinct will kick in and the large raptor which operates this machine will bite your fucking hand off

Today I learned that the creator of “Widow’s Bay” was The Babadook meme girl

乱七八糟的🐍

Spot. The difference.

“I asked ChatGPT-” Yeah well I asked Lieutenant Commander Data Soong from engineering and he told me that while he could, in fact, do my physics homework, he fears that it may have a negative impact on my academic performance and that he would not proceed with this arrangement.

Happy Pride Month

More of you need to learn about these ☝️

I feel like I need to share this because idk if Europeans are familiar with the presence of Aldi in the US, but at least especially in my area they’ve been growing a lot recently. Like Aldi bought out some local failing grocery chains where I live (Louisiana) and have opened Aldis in all these somewhat rural communities and small towns, which for the record I’m fine with

But as a result of this they are advertising a lot more in my area and also in many cases, the people in these areas have never been confronted with Aldi or any European grocery store. So the ads that Aldi is pushing out to its new US customer base feature a cowboy shopping at Aldi who is explaining to new Aldi customers how Aldi works. Like this cowboy is explaining you gotta put a quarter in the shopping cart and why there are very little name brands. A cowboy is how they want to reach their American customer base. They gave us a cowboy

Here he is, the Aldi Cowboy

people are soooo mean to the color yellow and it hurts my heart like u mean the color of the sun!?!? daffodils and buttercups and dandelions!? canary feathers and fresh butter and the warm glow of light and the trees in autumn???? for shame. joyless.